I woke up this morning thinking about our birth mom, and birth moms in general.

I’ve learned birth moms are in crisis when they choose adoption and many times their life is anything but pretty. Our birth mom is living the consequence of many bad choices. Without dispelling details onto the world wide web, she just cannot mother this child for an array of reasons.

I’m not ashamed to say that I have even questioned why she is pregnant and I am not.

It doesn’t take long for me to then realize where I have been the past 2 years and what God has done and is doing.

In a way only God could work, He has brought two women in crisis together and has performed the miracle of adoption.

She is in crisis because she is pregnant and I am in crisis because I am not pregnant.

To put it quite simply … We are a perfect match.

While birth moms tend to be harshly judged sometimes, I find a soft spot in my heart for her.

And it is not only because she is giving me her daughter.

Her choice of adoption is one that takes courage and bravery and while she cannot care for this child, she certainly does care about this baby.

At least in my experience, I have learned adoption is a two-way street. The needs and wants of both the birth mom and the adoptive family are listened to and met in a way that benefits both parties.

In a very surprising way, my desire to experience pregnancy and childbirth are, in a way, being met through the wishes and desires of our birth mom because she wants me there for ultrasounds and doctor appointments and she has requested I be present for labor and delivery. Besides giving me her child, there is absolutely no greater gift this woman could give me.

This was not something I had to ask of her. It was all her decision and one I will forever be grateful to her for. She has told me, “This is your daughter and you should be there.”

She may have a reputation of bad decisions, but when it comes down to this, she has made a courageous and brave decision to not only give her child to us because she knows she cannot take care of her, but she has also chosen to include me in the aspects of becoming a mother that I would otherwise miss out on.

Adoption is just a beautiful thing. I am so grateful to God that I am experiencing this miracle.

- Elaine