The song “How Great Thou Art” has been in my heart tonight. I praise the Lord because He is a great God and He has done great things in my life.

I think about where I was just three years ago and where I am today and I know nothing but the greatness of God could have brought me here.

I am anxiously anticipating Christmas this year with my wonderful husband and our two daughters.

Tonight, the praise on my lips for what God has done in my life was just a beautiful thing.

But you know what is even more beautiful?

When we praise Him when life isn’t beautiful.

I will be the first to say that it is totally okay to be angry at God if you are going through infertility and cannot see anything good right now.

I had my fair share of those moments along the way.

But I also remember knowing in the depth of my heart that I needed to be angry and then I needed to praise God in spite of it all.

There is just something beautiful about being in a place of complete disappointment and pain and yet knowing in the depth of your heart that God is in control and He is at work, even now, doing something beautiful beyond comprehension at the moment.

I know we can easily fall into the “God is punishing me” trap or the “God does not care about me” trap, but those are lies from Satan.

Choose to praise the Lord in spite of it all.

I cannot tell you how peaceful and exhilarating it is when you are in the middle of a trial, with darkness all around, and you praise God for it.

It reminds me of the anticipation of a child on Christmas morning!

They don’t know what is under the Christmas Tree, but they know it is good!

They hold high expectations of what they are going to see on Christmas morning when they tear into their presents.

And once they see, there are no disappointments!

I can remember when it “clicked” for me.

I just wanted a baby. All of this…the shots, the meds, the doctor appointments, the treatments…it was all because I wanted a baby.

And then I began to see that all of this was not just about me and my desire for a baby!

Instead it was all about God and I had the opportunity to let God receive glory through my unfortunate circumstances or I could continue to allow the focus to be all about me.

Since I knew that God promised in His word that He had plans for my life that would prosper me and not cause me harm, that would give me hope and a future, I knew that infertility for me was the time in my life where God was calling me to put my faith to action.

I had grown up in the church. There every Sunday since I was 3 weeks old. I began learning the truths of God as a very young child. It was all in my head.

Infertility was the fork in the road for me: is my faith in Jesus Christ going to continue to be “head knowledge” or am I going to put my faith to action and truly believe that God is going to do something great…something more than I can imagine?

I will never forget the “great expectation” that filled my heart when I realized this.

Realizing that God desired to do something GREAT through my horrible circumstances was a turning point for me.

Sure I still had the “bad days” where I questioned why God was not allowing me to get pregnant, but ultimately I was waiting with great expectation on what God was going to do in His time for His glory!

And then…

things started happening!

April 9, 2009, was the appointed day that God started revealing the “Something More” He had planned for me.

It started with the day we turned in our adoption paperwork and were told that very same day we could adopt a baby girl due to be born in just two months.

That was just the first of God’s miracles in my life.

Tonight I was just overwhelmed with the greatness of our God as that song filled my heart.

If life isn’t beautiful for you right now, have your moments of grief and sorrow but then praise Him for what He is going to do in His time!

- Elaine