I was very apprehensive about parenting a 2-year-old and newborn. I remember telling myself if I could just make it through the first six months, I would be home free! Today is February 1st and I can hardly believe that my little Sweet Pea turns six months old tomorrow!

They say going from 1 to 2 kids is quite challenging. Having two kids two years apart has been very tricky at times but over the past 6 months, I’ve come up with a Top 10 List of things that have made life less hectic for me along the way. Thought I would share them here…

1. Have a playpen with toys/books set up for the older child to play in. Ours is set up in our bedroom. This is an absolute necessity for me because of the fact that Little Bug is the type of child that even at the age of 2.5 years old I have to keep a constant eye on her and if things go quiet for more than one minute I know she is up to something. So, if I need a few minutes to take care of the baby without having to worry about watching Little Bug, the playpen is a life-saver.

2. Let cleaning your house go. Especially in those first 2-3 months. Once the craziness of the newborn phase is over, you can slowly work back to keeping up with cleaning. Before Sweet Pea, I would spend about 30 minutes a day on cleaning. That way I didn’t have it all pile up on me and it was easy to tackle one task a day for half an hour. I let all that go when Sweet Pea was born. Weeks would go by without cleaning. If you are a neat-freak like me, you just have to learn that it is okay for the bathroom to be dirty and for dust to be on the furniture. I’ve just recently gotten back into my 30 minutes/day of cleaning to stay on top of things, most weeks. There is more to life than a clean house so…let it go!! My house won’t ever be as clean as it was before kids because 1) kids make messes and 2) it is more important to spend time with my girls than to have a model home!

3. Learn to laugh at the chaos instead of cry. Those first 8-12ish weeks were super crazy for me! Many moments I just had to stop and choose to laugh…or else it was cry and laughing is way more fun and relaxing! I would also think in those moments, “My girls won’t be this little for long. Before I know it they are going to be all grown up and I will miss these crazy baby days!” It is called being content with life how it is at that very moment. It goes a long way for relieving stress in those crazy moments (which will be VERY frequent during the first 2-3 months!).

4. Stay home more. This may not work for everyone, but for me, it does. Sometimes, it is just easier to stay at home and not go anywhere because going somewhere involves packing everyone up (bottles, diapers, paci, burp clothes, wipes, etc.) and having to manage everyone’s needs while out and about. Just not worth it much to me when you have two small children! That being said…I am not a hermit by any means now. Miss Social Butterfly would not have that! We do get out of the house! However, those random trips to PetSmart to have an “inside zoo” experience when it is 90 degrees outside don’t happen in the stage of life we are in now! It is just not worth the effort. It is much easier to just put them in the stroller and go for a walk around the block between Sweet Pea’s feeds! Once again, though, those impromptu PetSmart trips will come back…one day. And pretty soon, it is going to be easier and worth it again to pack everyone up and head out for an adventure beyond our home/neighborhood. (Side Note: Another huge reason for our staying home so much has been because of Sweet Pea’s overstimulation issues. It is easier to control her environment in my own house and keep her from getting overstimulated than it is for me to control her environment outside of our house. Hopefully, these overstimulation days are coming to an end soon though.)

5. When we do go somewhere and I am leaving without the help of my husband because he is at work, I always pack the car before putting the girls in the car. Usually, we are leaving after naptime so while both are tucked away in their cribs, I put diaper bags and anything else that needs to go with us in the car. If we are leaving after Little Bug does IP then I pack the car while Little Bug is playing in her room and Sweet Pea is sleeping. Then, when it is time to go, all I have to do is snap Little Bug’s car seat into the base and buckle Little Bug in and we are good to go!

6. Put both children on a schedule. Again, this may not work for everyone, but for me, I couldn’t imagine NOT having my girls on a schedule! Babywise is a lifesaver for my family. Babywise makes the smooth days that run like clockwork the norm and the crazy, chaotic days something that happens every once in a while when someone is having an ‘off’ day. Babywise makes life simpler because I know when the baby needs to eat and sleep – there are no guessing games. I have found in my babysitting/nanny/parenting experience that children thrive off routine and scheduling and I have seen this be true in the lives of both of my daughters.

7. Take time for yourself. I think so many times mothers feel guilty if they even want time away from their children! Find a time for you to do something apart from your children. For me, it is Saturday mornings. Dave gets up with the girls and lets me sleep in. It is good for children to have that one-on-one time with their Daddy. Little Bug loves Saturday mornings with her Daddy. He makes her a special French toast breakfast and they play together until it is time to come wake me up.

8. Get yourself ready to leave the house before the kids wake up. This is SUCH a time saver! After Sweet Pea’s birth I was late to everything. And I do mean everything. Late. I hate being late. If I am planning to leave the house with the girls in the early morning (before Little Bug has her IP time) I have found the easiest way to ensure we leave on time is for me to set my alarm half an hour or so before the girls are up and get myself ready during that time. When they wake up, I am ahead of the game and it is so much easier to feed and dress two little girls when I am already ready to walk out the door!

9. Plan ahead. Organization goes a LONG way when you have two small kids. If we are leaving to go somewhere I pack diaper bags, gets sippies and bottles prepared, lay out clothes, etc., the night before. I also have an “emergency diaper bag” in my car that has essentials for both girls should I forget to put something in their normal diaper bag/backpack. All that being said, there are still times where I forget things and am kicking myself! Just recently we packed everything and everyone up to go somewhere and we got there and realized Sweet Pea’s formula was still sitting in our refrigerator at home! Talk about frustrating!! Dave went back to get it and instead of being totally mad at myself I allowed myself to be human and forget something and went on with the day. Planning ahead and being organized does certainly eliminate most of those incidences though!

10. Right after Sweet Pea’s birth I had two baskets full of supplies for her. One was in our living room and the other was in our bedroom. I did this mainly for convenience-sake. Instead of having to go to her bedroom for every diaper change and every time she needed a new bib (which was very frequent!), I had diapers, bibs, burp clothes, wipes and onesies right there for me to use. Once I set up those baskets I felt more organized at home with things!

Ok, I know that is 10, but I just thought of another hugely helpful tip: Operate 15 minutes ahead of normal time. If we have to leave the house by 10am, I tell myself we have to leave by 9:45am. That extra 15 minutes allows for the poopy diaper I have to change right as we are ready to leave the house or to run back in the house to grab something I forgot. Once I get in the car and we are finally ready to go after taking care of all the unexpected things that you can just expect WILL happen with two small kiddos, I look at the clock and we are pulling out right on time…thanks to those extra 15 minutes!!

That’s my top 10 11.

Also, remember…time. There is certainly an adjustment period as bringing another child into the family changes everything. But, with time, things level out and life just falls into a new normal.

We are definitely there now and it feels great!!

- Elaine